Feeling Blue and Pitch Perfect 2

I've been feeling really ill and down lately. A colleague at work spread his illness around and of course I soon got it, because I am susceptible to everything. I am genuinely scared of an impending virus outbreak or zombie apocalypse because I would be the one to fall ill/die straight away. And I'm scared of everything so surviving that would be detrimental to my mental health aha!

I've been feeling stuck in a rut lately. With blogging and in daily life. I think it's only because I've been ill that I've felt this way but I've just felt like I'm meant to be having some massive adventure and all I do is go to work. I have an active social life and a great relationship but I just want to get out there, go to a beach, go on holiday, go shopping in New York do something that I can look forward to and have a break from the stresses of life. I actually have been really wanting to go camping lately, grab a bunch of mates - or the very least people I don't believe are complete bell ends, and go camping for a weekend. Considering I'm a habitual creature that is intensely anxious and uncomfortable by change, I really want something new to happen.


Thursday I went to the cinema with Danielle to cheer her up. She's been through a lot lately and needed some best friend time. 

Pitch Perfect 2 was a-ca-mazing. (Spoiler Alerts to follow). It's more emotional than the first one because everyone's growing up and graduating *sobs uncontrollably* and the Germans in the film are so intimidating and scary. I also sang and danced a little to Dannii who wasn't impressed aha!

She may have not been impressed with my theatrics but we even have our own characters. I am Fat Amy and she is Becca. If you ever want to get to know me and Dannii in real life then you just have to watch this film franchise. One key scene that pointed this out was when Fat Amy rolled in drunk and Becca was stressing about her 'secret' internship. Amy was all "Have some of my confidence" and started caressing herself and Becca, whilst Becca was much more reserved and pretending nothing was wrong although she was under severe stress and pressure - just like Dannii! 

My new saying is "Have some butt confidence." Jamie and I have a secret joke fest about butts. I'm hoping by reading this he understands my future reference (just like my Mean Girls ones) or I may have to have a girly film day with him.

 It's films like this that make me wish I'd have stuck to something as a kid. I tried every club going including Girls Scouts, Girls Brigade, karate, St John's Ambulance and a bunch of others I think I still weirdly have the uniform for (my Mum's a hoarder) that I quit after about 2 weeks. I was such an anxious child. I just couldn't be tamed and entertained for long enough.


Friday and the entire weekend went completely not how I imagined it was going to. After work I was tired and a little blergh (trust me, that is an actual emotion) and I was on the way to my bike when I got spammed (I say spammed because I rarely receive two texts at the same time and it was a pretty good moment) off my boyfriend and one of my best friend's. Jamie was altering his plans and going out with the boys and Kim wanted me to go to her pub (if you think it's impressive that her family own a pub then you should see her house!) and so after 25 minutes of rotating phone calls we all had plans in set in motion. 

 I was originally going out for a drink and meal and ended up crawling into my house a wad of cash lighter, drunk and actually a bit lonely (I only really get drunk out with my group and Jamie is part of that so we get drunk together and then go to his and spoon). I'll spare Jamie and Kim their embarrassing photos but they were a lot worse off than me the next day :') I had to bring reinforcements to Jamie's to make him human again. 

A thing that aggravates me every single day is people that think that because you are engaging in a meaningless conversation then they are being hit on by you. This happens to me sometimes and I actually coined the phrase "Have you SEEN my boyfriend?" before proceeding to show them couples photos and justifying how happy I am. I don't know why I rise to the bait though. These people clearly need some sort of attention for their insecurity if  "Are you being served next?" means you want them. 

Due to illness I was feeling the "wrap up and be as warm as you can" gypsy vibes. You can see the full skirt here because I couldn't find a full length mirror anywhere. Not to self: purchase a full length mirror.

The food was amazing. Kim and I split a Parmo and a burger with some chips and salad. I also had some cheese garlic dough balls for starter. Nicest tasting restaurant food I've had in a long time.

I have slightly fell off my healthy eating regime lately. I still stay away from chocolate, crisps and sweets but I find meals harder and harder to want when they aren't full of junk. And with being ill lately I've been eating ice pops and ice cream like they're going out of fashion.

Now I'm feeling better I'm getting back onto my food plan for the week. Finding salad appealing is hard generally but I'm surrounded by temptation all the freaking time. I need some sort of motivation. Cycling is great and I adore it but I find it hard to cycle in my downtime as it is my method of getting to work at 6 in the morning. I did enjoy a little walk yesterday. Usually I hate walking, I feel awkward doing it, like I am on the way to somewhere using the slowest method of travel ever. Also walking with friends and family I just get really awkward when we run out of conversation, although I don't care about this at any other time. Such a weirdo. 

I also saw this which I thought was so cool. 

Next week I think we have some sort of paint-balling plans. I've never been so I'm excited and nervous. I'm quite submissive in sports like bowling so I think I'll just be an easy target to people. I hang round with boys who can be pricks but weirdly we wouldn't have them any other way.

I've also decided to get my craft on. I'm friends with a few artists that are happy as Larry all the time. I asked them what their secret to destressing was and of course (I should have seen it coming) was doing some form of art. I was really arts and crafty as a child but started neglecting it when I realised that everyone in the working world is replaceable and I have bills to pay but not the passion or confidence to pursue it as a career. I have decided to get back into it in my downtime though and have just purchased a Tie Dying Kit! 

I'm really wanting to move out soon for some privacy. Today I came home after a lovely weekend to my brother and his girlfriend in my bedroom. They refused to move because they were watching a DVD and when they did it was because it wasn't 'worth the agro.' Dude, you're 26 this year, stop hanging round in your little sister's room. It's creepy and actually disgusting. 

So I have a lot of plans for blogging and real life it's just getting to time and motivation (and privacy) to do it. 

How do you stay motivated? 

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