I'm Dreading My First Holiday Abroad....

I am going to Spain tomorrow! Yayyyyy. I'm so excited for my first holiday abroad and my first holiday in general for around 8 or 9 years <<< This totally just contradicted the title but please, bare with me.

I am really excited, I'm off work, my family are looking after the flat but I also have an overwhelming sense of dread. 

I have never left the country before for a holiday. When I was 13 or 14 I went on a school trip to Prague with my year and the year above but apart from my parents paying for it (bless them), we didn't have to do anything. The school dealt with everything and we traveled on a coach the ENTIRE TIME. This is where I found out that I suffer from extreme travel sickness.


You might be thinking, "You have everything sorted, what are you worrying about?"

No. My boyfriend sorted it out. I don't have a fucking clue. (Thanks Jamie, I love you for doing it).

I didn't know that we had to check in online and print out our boarding passes, I don't know how many hours I'm supposed to arrive before we set off, I didn't know how to get euro's, I don't know what to pack, where we're staying, what we're doing, how much money we should take, how we get from the airport to the hotel and liquids....I DON'T KNOW THE LIQUID RULE.

I vape (I quit smoking, I'm not a arsehole) and I was googling around in regards to liquids in hand luggage and liquids in main luggage and then I realised that as well as my vaping liquids, I have shampoo, conditioner, perfume, body spray - everything I use day to day is a liquid and every website on this planet contradicts itself. I'm just going to shove it all in there and pray they don't make me bin it.... or that they let me keep it and it doesn't explode... everywhere.

Next dread: People.

I hate people. All kinds of people. Generally, just the human race. We're going to Benidorm and we're all inclusive at our resort/hotel thing but I have this paralysing fear that we are going to get robbed.

This definitely stems from the one and only time that I went abroad and the maid stole my straighteners and broke all of my makeup brushes. I complained to the hotel and they said it was my fault for not locking it all in the safe. The fuck? I (my parents because I was 14) paid for a hotel room and the safe was shared with two other people (I may have to blog about Prague...beautiful place, horrible school children) why the fuck should I have to lock it in a safe when the room was locked? Is that their culture, their rules? I do not know anything!

So as well as fearing that I'm going to get robbed by the hotel we are staying at, I'm also scared we're going to get robbed when we go out and about. 

I'm a water/beach lover. I bought two swimming costumes and have accepted the fact that only my bra's make it look it like I have tits so I plan to spend every waking minute that I can in some form of water.

Where do we put our stuff? I want to take pictures (because I'm as touristy as you can get) so I'll have my phone on me, spare clothes, a towel..I'm basically taking a big fuck off bag...where do I put that when we go to the water? I'm not a strong swimmer either so I'm more likely to drown than save my personal possessions.

3. My phone contract

This is ridiculous. Completely ridiculous but I have to post it because it's a genuine concern.

As I wrote yesterday, I don't really have a lot of money because I pay to live, I have a fixed term contract and I'm still paying off my overdraft thanks to the utter babes that are my ex flatmates and the cling on girlfriend. 

I am scared that I'll forget to turn off my mobile data or onto flight mode and come back to a really big bill. I can only just afford it now. 

Hadfield comes home to $1.37 million Rogers phone bill

Okay, he went to Space but, ya know.

4. How many clothes do you take?

I don't know the weather and don't trust forecast sites. My neighbour and colleague are in Benidorm now and are telling me completely different things and I genuinely have menopausal hot flushes (I really hope it's not the menopause...I'm 23) and then freeze moments later in jolly old England. 

I have half of my wardrobe in a basket and I'm pretty certain they won't bend the 15kg allowance for me.

5. Airports

I have never been to one. I have always watched shows like 'Locked Up Abroad' and 'Nothing to Declare' and for some reason, have this paralysing fear that I'm going to get locked up for smuggling a wad of cocaine or something...I don't do drugs in the slightest but the thought is there. 

"What if I lose my luggage?"

I don't like being apart from my stuff at all. With what happened in Prague and that time I was mugged at Uni (someone stole my bag and it had everything in it. I commuted to University so was so panicked and stressed out that fortunately one of my course mates lent me a tenner to get home. I then felt bad about owing her money because I don't like lending money off people but I didn't have a bank card for another 6 weeks after) I really hate it when my stuff is not in sight. I have to be apart from my luggage and not actually know where it is whilst hoping someone doesn't collect it before me for many, many horrific hours.

6. Travel Sickness

I get sick going down the road to work in the car, I've never been on a plane and my ears need to 'pop' when we take a trip to the grocery store. 

I don't want to be 'that person' that causes problems on the plane.

7. Hospitals

I'm the dickhead that could be walking to the toilet and break her ankle. When I was in Primary school, I got one of those pogo sticks that was all the craze back then. Within three jumps I was on the floor with a badly sprained ankle. Similar injuries include; that time we went on a night out and I sprained my (the same) ankle and that time I tried to be a pro skater and broke my ankle. My ankles don't seem to cope with anything. If I walk slowly and watch out for wet floors as well as avoiding any kind of sports then I should be okay, right?

I only got one of those health cards because a colleague told me to. Jamie still has one from when he went away last year so never brought it up! 

8. The Water

Okay, this is a push but I have been warned by everyone to not drink the water. Apparently foreigners entering other countries cannot tolerate the way water is filtered and it can make them ill. Knowing me, I'd wake up thirsty (we're all inclusive so probably hungover) down a nice cold glass and end up with the shits for the entire week. (Nice imagery, huh?)

Okay, I think that's it on the irrational fears list. It's 2pm and I still haven't packed. I think once I have actually packed then I'll be okay. Who leaves their packing until a day before they go?!

Oh yeah, me. I do. I did this when I was moving out...three times. 

I will learn.

If you have any advice for travel abroad virgins or even any horror stories to further worry me about tomorrow then please share in the comments below or find me on other social media linked all over this blog and below and spam me with it.

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  1. Haha what a brilliant post!
    I'm sure you'll be fine and that the majority of these situations you've imagined won't happen. Sounds like Jamie had his shit together though...

    Enjoy your holiday and please take photos so I can feel jealous!

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    1. You were totally right! Everything I wrote about here was a bit of an over exaggeration aha! I'm about to blog about it ;) and there's plenty of photos! :D:D:D <3 <3